After my second wife — the one I really loved and would have married sooner if my first wife hadn’t made such a poor decision in agreeing to marry me first (which was part of the settlement — she admits she made a terrible decision and gets the rights to most of my early work) — left me, I didn’t think I’d ever love again. But then my second wife (who shall remain nameless, as per my attorney’s advice) pointed out that I was in love with myself (her keen observations are part of why I fell in love with her in the first place) to which I responded, “Well if I’m so in love with myself why don’t I just go ahead and marry me?” which is the last thing I ever said to her, unless you count voicemails, which I’m still convinced she didn’t receive, despite what the court order may claim.
So anyway I tried to take my second wife’s advice (as any loyal husband would) and went down to the courthouse (I had been married twice already and I didn’t want a big ceremony) and filled out all the forms and turned them into the clerk who eyed me suspiciously and said, “Sir, is this a joke or do you and your spouse-to-be really have the exact same name, address, and date of birth?” I explained as calmly as passion allowed that it was most certainly not a joke, that I was in love and I wanted the world to know it and the state to recognize it. And that’s all I’ll say about that situation pending the outcome of my lawsuit, but I remain optimistic.
Also I’d like to remind you that John Fontaine novels make a great Valentine’s Day gift for someone you love or just for yourself, especially anything published in about the last 10 years or so.
Happy Valentine’s Day,
jf, npfw
johnfontaine [at] bobsoldout.com
[...] Under: JOHN FONTAINE PRESENTS… by bobsoldout — Leave a comment Feb 28, 2010 After my Valentine’s Day Note was published here at Bobsoldout.com, I received a lot of electronic fan mail letters in my [...]